nostalgia of a better me

Hey there! I’ve been feeling a bit nostalgic lately. Like remembering the past a lot lot. Have you ever gone through a phase like that? I normally have a “cozy phase”(this is the name I’ve given them) during the christmas holiday. I look for comfort things that never fail to make me happy and warm. The food I crave is mainly jelly and ice cream, maybe a bit of avocado toast and tea. The books I reread are Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, maybe a cheeky Asterix and Obelix comic. The movies are also HP and LOTR, combined with Shrek and About time, and a mix of christmas classics like the Grinch, Love actually, The Family Stones. It all make me feel young and happy again. And lately I’ve been beginning to feel this again, just not on Christmas.

My past self had her shit together, knew what she wanted to be. She knew what she liked and what she didn’t. She was fit, she eat healthy. She took her dogs on walks and was in charge of watering the garden. She managed to be part of the volleyball team and maintain good grades. She was a prefect and the class clown, a nerd and a badass. The world was just waiting for her to take it on. What the actual fuck happened?

I don’t know. But I guess this is why I go through this phases, I want my old self to come back and fix it all. Get my shit together and organise my life. So, I keep doing all the stuff she loves. Or at least that’s my conclusion. I do not think there’s nothing wrong this reminiscing, I actually think it’s kind of healthy to feel comfortable in the best possible every once in a while. And know is my time.

I will re read HP and Lotr, I will watch all my cozy movies, I will eat my avocado toast and drink my tea. And I will feel good. Hopefully.

A hopeful hug (again),

emi

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